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Top 10 Mysterious Mysteries

My wife gets addicted to some strange things, usually revolving around true crime and fake paranormal. Here I am, minding me own business, and i hear this bizarre stuff from the computer, essentially Art Bell with an almost indescribable monotone voice. Here’s an example:

What I loved about his videos, beyond the crazy affected voice, was how many of the supposed baffling mysteries were only slightly more mysterious than how toast is made. Terrible camcorder footage of moths flying at a light is somehow interpreted as evidence of fairies, UFO’s, tiny flying Sasquatch, whatever. Since there are only so many genuine weird videos produced every month, he depends on his viewers to send in what seem to most people as simple forgeries. But I have to love it. They pretend the videos are real and he pretends to believe them. There’s something touching about this mutual faith, like when some kung-fu master claims he can knock out people with a mere touch, and his students sell this premise like crazy, flying across the room if he so much as glances sideways at them, victims of his all powerful chi.

Which is all well and good until the master starts to actually believe this incredible bucket of pony manure and is challenged by a legit MMA artist. the results are both sad and endearingly hilarious.

Anyway, this Chills guy was just too cool to leave unparodied, so I mentioned this to the Videostore Junkies podcast team and we quickly decided to make a video. Alan, Rene, Zach and Paul made videos and i was tasked to compile it all together.

Predictably, I then went off on many tangents, got halfway finished, and then LOST IT ALL IN A HArD DRIVE CRASH, which is a great excuse when you have done nothing, but was sadly true and I want to stop thinking about it because there is stuff I will never get back.

This hard lesson taught me to spring for a cloud based storage system so that it hopefully never happens again.

Anyway, some footage was saved thanks to me showing them the work in progress and amazingly, Rene still had it. So I took what I had, redid some of the rest, pared it down, and decided on a funny bit that would include Emlee Vasillos as Mrs. Chills. We shot this part during out week long creative session at Scott Perri’s amazing home during the summer of 2022. At some point Emlee suggested the opening segment, which would dovetail nicely with the Mrs Chills bit, and we had fortunately brought some costume stuff from a completely unrelated project that could turn the lovely Ms. Vasillos into a purported woman of easy virtue. Many cars slowed down while we filmed this sequence.

Currently making the rounds at film festivals, I guess I’ll know soon enough if this is as funny as I thought it was, or if it is one of those things that you have to be in on the joke to understand.